Hello and welcome back, dear friends, to this week’s Trailer Park. I’m your old pal Spooky and I’m here to bring to you only the best in the latest and greatest teasers, trailers, and clips. I scour the inter-tubes and bring them all here in one sweet spot for your viewing pleasure. It’s a thankless job, so you can thank me in the comments section below. This week:
- Machete kills in Machete Kills!
- Frankenstein gets another steampunk treatment in the dark and creative-looking Frankenstein’s Army.
- The endlessly talented Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays a porn-obsessed Jersey shore type in his directorial feature debut Don Jon.
- Robert DeNiro does what he does best (look calmly menacing) in the comedy The Family.
- Percy Jackson is back for more adventure with an all-star cast in Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters.
- Lastly, if you’re on the same TMNT lovefest I am, then check out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows trailer spotlighting all the turtles as they do what they do best, give’em shell!
Machete Kills [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQegSVzkrzQ[/youtube] Directed by Robert Rodriguez (Machete) Starring: Danny Trejo, Amber Heard, Mel Gibson, Carlos Estevez (Charlie Sheen), Jessica Alba, Sofia Vergara, Anotnio Banderez, and Lady Gaga. Machete is back! Exciting in and of itself, but add a bigger-than-ever cast that includes not one but two actors with public breakdowns! Fans of the first Machete look to be guaranteed a satisfying sequel, in that the same spirit that conceived the movie from a Grindhouse trailer is firmly intact in Machete Kills. If there is any complaint about this trailer, it’s that it didn’t come out sooner. In theaters 9/13/13 Frankenstein Army [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0nMNoTkq5A[/youtube] Directed by Richard Raaphors (Beyond Re-Animator) Starring: Karel Roden, Joshua Sasse, Robert Gwilym Nazi zombies are nothing new, and neither is Frankenstein… if there’s any difference that is. What’s really eye catching about Frankenstein’s Army is concept artist’s Richard Raaphor’s look to the film. Filled with a dark steampunk / weird science look, the trailer alone should sell any fan of the freaky on one viewing. The supernatural horror/action film will be available July 26 in limited theatrical release and VOD. Don Jon [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=edK5vyf8Fpo[/youtube] Written & Directed by Joseph Gordon-Levitt Starring: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Scarlett Johansson, Julianne Moore, and Tony Danza. Joseph Gordon-Levitt makes his on-screen reunion with Tony Danza (see Angels in the Outfield) in his feature film directorial and writing debut, Don Jon. Dropped off the Jersey Shore boardwalk is Don Jon, a man obsessed with his body, his home, his car, his church, his friends, his women, and his porn. It seems hard for JGL to do any wrong and based on this trailer he continues to be Hollywood’s golden child. The cast seems amazing and the story looks fresh while playing with the still-taboo subject of porn. In theaters 10/18/13 The Family [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_85n08QGCRQ[/youtube] Directed by Luc Besson Starring: Robert DeNiro, Michelle Phiffer, and Tommy Lee Jones Luc Besson, mostly known for his action films, takes a diagonal step into action comedy with a cast already known for playing the same roles. Robert DeNiro plays a mafioso, Michelle Phiffer plays a harpy, and Tommy Lee Jones plays the straight-faced funny man. I’m sold. When DeNiro’s family gets put into witness protection in France, they find it hard to give up the life. This looks to be one of those pure popcorn movies, fun for the fun of it. In theaters 9/20/13 Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLBWNAgQgtk[/youtube] Directed by Thor Freudenthal Starring: Logan Lerman, Alexandria Daddario, Sean Bean, Nathan Fillion, and Stanley Tucci. Percy Jackson, son of Poseidon, embarks on another adventure through Greek mythology in this long-awaited sequel. For fans of the book series and Potterphiles with nothing left to live for, this teen adventure film is exactly what they’ve been missing. I’m in for Logan Lerman (Perks of Being a Wallflower), Nathan Fillion, Stanley Tucci, and Greek mythology. This is the movie that will keep the summer movie fun alive after Man of Steel has left the theaters. In theaters 8/7/13 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-M9lh60lFE[/youtube] From Red Fly StudiosAvailable on PC, XBox Live, and PSN The turtles are back and creepy as ever! This too-realistic downloadable beat’em up definitely looks to have the feel of the old double-screened arcade game, but looking them in the eye may take a little time. Much as the debut of the Nickelodeon series has renewed my TMNT love, the design of this game puts me off a bit. Anyone see Aliens in the Attic? It’s kinda like that, but with nun-chucks. Available for download soon. What are you excited for this year? Let us know in the comment section below or email us at movieissues@gmail.com, and don’t forget to listen to me and Leland every Friday on the Movie Issues Podcast!