Have you been wishing you could just get away lately? Take a trip somewhere far away? I mean really far away? You’re in luck; Hidden Universe Travel Guides has released the Complete Marvel Cosmos, a travel guide that gives you tips and tricks for some of the best destinations in the Marvel Universe, from the Savage Land all the way to Svartalfheim. And your copy is extra special, because the Guardians of the Galaxy got ahold of it first and scribbled all kinds of notes in it.
Seriously, the writing in this book is already more interesting than what you’d usually get from a fictional guide book, but the quips and insults the Guardians keep throwing at each other are what makes it brilliant.
In a lot of the fictional guide books and encyclopedias that I’ve read the descriptions start to get a little tedious sometimes. Not this book. Each section is short and sweet, and while the author made an attempt to be serious, sometimes they get downright unprofessional.
What to wear on Planet Moord:
Body armor, some sort of cloaking equipment, and a large arsenal of weapons
How to get around on Planet Moord:
Run. Hide. Then run some more.
And when discussing what to wear on Chitauri Prime:
..do the rest of the universe a favor and strap a large thermonuclear device to your body armor. That way, when you are inevitably slaughtered by the Chitauri, at least you will take this miserable mud ball down with you.
But that’s just the author of the guide book. Each of the Guardians has something to add every few paragraphs, and it never stopped being awesome.
The Giant Sentient Planet Ego
“Before Ego mastered self-propulsion, he traveled through space using a giant thruster attached to his south pole.”
“I am Groot.”
“I was totally gonna say that!” – Rocket
Getting around in New Attlan
“Nontraditional options, however, are abundant – including teleporting dogs and a giant Inhuman head that can instantaneously transport you to wherever it is you need to go!’
“I think I shall walk.” – Gamora
The Savage Land
“Tourism has increased dramatically, with visitors eager to see these giant prehistoric lizards in their natural habitat.”
“I saw that movie. It does not end well.” – Rocket
“BUT THAT LEAD ACTOR IS SOOOOO HANDSOME, RIGHT?” – Star-Lord
And Drax is always good for being very very literal.
“Don’t mind Drax, folks, his heart’s in the right place.” – Star-Lord
“My chest.” – Drax
And I kinda want this Drax quote on a t-shirt:
A foe that never dies is simply one that you may hit forever.
The graphic design and artwork in the book is excellent as well; I’ve bought actual travel books to use in THIS universe that I wish were this well put together. Plus if you’ve been meaning to catch up on your Marvel lore and want to know what the heck is up with the Cancerverse, this is the book for you.
Hidden Universe Travel Guides: The Complete Marvel Cosmos: With Notes by the Guardians of the Galaxy is available now.