Abraham Lincoln towers over American history- at over six feet tall, quite literally. Tales of his mighty arm, rough-hewn eloquence, and political skill are conveyed by industrious schoolteachers and historians across the United States. Inspired by his victorious leadership in the American Civil War, the internet’s foremost tacticians have concluded that, much like Batman with prep time, Abraham Lincoln could destroy any challenger, no matter how fearsome.

Tragically, Lincoln’s campaign to drive malevolent vampires from North America remained undocumented- until now, with the release of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

This book by Pride and Prejudice and Zombies author Seth Grahame-Smith actually exists. I have to make that clear immediately, lest the reader think it a product of an acid trip. Read On