Just got home from the IMAX version of Transformers 2 with the lowest of expectations of just watching robots fight.  I got what I came for and now here’s my easy to read review broken into 4 pieces and 2 groups.  Robots, Explosions, Plot, and Tits, grouped into Good and Bad.

The Good Stuff

Robots
I loved them.  ILM once again, brought our imaginations of transforming robots to life.   When fans asked for more robots, we got them.  We asked for more fight sequences and oh boy did we get them. The fight sequences were wonderfully choreographed. You can tell that ILM held nothing back when it came to special weapons and robot brawls.

To read more, just go past the break.  There’s a lot you need to read before watching the movie.  Don’t worry. There aren’t any spoilers.

Ouch

Continue reading…

Advanced CG Graphics are being used for Bumble Bee

The popularity of Transformers 2 is bewildering.

It looks like brilliant advertising has made it impossible for consumers to discern (1) a movie with big explosions, flashing lights and a pair of tits from (2) a genuinely shitty movie.

A midnight opening was once reserved for a certain (negative) stereotype, but it has somehow found its way onto the Twitters and Facebook statuses of the mainstream.

The numbers at the box office make one wonder: how many of those ticket-buyers have actually heard of or seen the original Transformers? And while it’s not intended to be a condescending speculation, it’s hard for me to believe that the majority of the (millions of) people who have seen it (and who will see it) were interested in overgrown transforming robots from the 80s.

So, what makes these CGI’d Takara toys so appealing and how were so many people enticed?

I can only conclude that the media has done a wonderful job of spoon-feeding us gold plated piles of shit – the kind with big explosions, flashing lights and a pair of tits.

What will they think of next?

Click to Play

While stopping by Target’s “Bulleye Lounge” I got to try out a demo multiplayer game of Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen.  After finishing 2 games, a handsome and studly man tells the booth employee that he wants to play and proceeds to take my Xbox 360 controller.  This handsome man looked easily familiar to any Transformers fan.  It was Tyrese Gibson.  It was awesome that he stopped by to play and gave us a few moments to talk to our camera.

Don’t forget, Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen, comes out in theaters June 24th. For a trailer of the movie, click here.

Can you hear that? It’s the sounds of explosions, special effects and Megan’s new boobs coming to theaters June 24, 2009.  Below are three new TV spots to keep the Transformers hype going until then. Enjoy.

For the other 2, go past the break.

We also have a video of Megan in her best acting role ever. Check it out.

[source]

Esquire gives us the closest chance to waking up next to Transformers hottie, Megan Fox. It’s everything we’ve ever wanted in a woman: she’s wiggling her nearly-naked body around in the bedsheets, wrapping her lips around some beers, and gobbling up a fat piece of meat – I mean, a hamburger.

With the lack of dialogue and focus on her different (ahem) assets, it’s easily her best role ever. While we forgive Megan for sucking as an actress, this sexy photo shoot video eagerly begs the question: does she suck at other things?

Robots, Action, Explosions, and Girls undressing. What more could you ask for in a Michael Bay film? A plot? We’ll see.  The clips above look pretty sweet.

W00t! Paramount Pictures released the robots and their names for Transformers 2!

AUTOBOTS

Optimus Prime: The Autobots’ leader – alternate form: Peterbilt truck.
Ironhide: Weapons specialist – GMC Topkick.
Ratchet: Medic – Hummer H2.
Bumblebee: Friend and mode of transportation for Sam Witwicky – 2010 Chevorlet Camaro.
Arcee: A female Autobot – Megan Fox’s hot-pink motorcycle.
Jetfire: A fighter plane crash-landed on Earth a long time ago, and he will become a reformed Decepticon now fighting for the humans. His alternate form is the SR-71 Blackbird, a sleek Cold War spy plane. “He’s old, craggy, forgetful … doesn’t work very well. Can’t transform very well, because he’s very geriatric. They get stuck with him a lot,” Bay says. “He knows the plan of the bad guys, but he forgets all the good parts of the plan.”
Sideswipe: A candy-apple red Lamborghini in the original, joins the cast this time as General Motor’s silver Corvette Stingray concept car.
Jolt: the original toy was a Decepticon, but in the movie he’s a good guy – Chevrolet Volt plug-in hybrid.
Skid & Mudflap: a.k.a. “The Twins” – Chevrolet Beat and Trax concept cars. “Some of the junior Transformers are just dumb,” Bay says with a laugh. “But it’s great for kids because they’re like the Little Engine That Could. They’re (screw)-ups, but they get really heroic at the end.”

Decepticons

Starscream: Formerly Megatron’s second in command, he escaped at the end of the first movie; F-22 Raptor jet.
Scorponok: The mechanical scorpion that attacked the American troops in the desert.
The Fallen: An ancient robot, sort of the Transformers’ version of Lucifer. He’s one of the original robot aliens, and his defiance and arrogance led to his banishment into another dimension. The screenwriters call him “the most elemental bad guy” and say that The Fallen holds the key to life on both Earth and Cybertron, the Transformers’ home planet.

Sideways: The Audi R8 seen crashing through a building in the trailer.
Soundwave: A cassette player in the original toys. An evil communications expert but this time in the form of an orbiting space satellite.
Ravage: The ultimate spy. A four-legged, cat-like robot. Ravage doesn’t turn into anything. “In the spirit of ‘more than meets the eye,’ Ravage isn’t just lethal because of his sharp teeth,” says screenwriter Alex Kurtzman. “There’s actually another skill set Ravage has that didn’t exist before, so there’s going to be a surprise for fans.” He doesn’t talk like the other Transformers.

The Doctor: A spider-like droid that transforms into various implements of torture.
Wheelie: A small, radio-controlled truck.
Demolisher: One of the Constructicons that transform into construction vehicles.
Devastator: A giant robot formed by the Constructicons joining together; individually, they are: Scavenger, Scrapper, Hightower, Longhaul, Rampage, Overload and Mixmaster. “He’s made of vehicles designed to build, and he turns into is someone who loves to destroy,” Orci says. “He is an agent of absolute chaos.” Michael Bay says that when Steven Spielberg saw Devastator, he said “This is (expletive) awesome!’ ” Bay says,  “It’s always nice when you can make him swear.”
Megatron: (unannounced)